Appropriate Sympathy Gift
In addition to sending flowers, what would you give to a relatively close friend who lost his wife suddenly in a tragic accident? Anything? A fruit basket is cheesy and a box of cigars seems inappropriate. Any advice would be appreciated, the services are this Saturday...
ianimal Just be there for him (and his kids if they have any). Call, don't text, and let him know you're there to help out in anyway. No "gift" is going to change how he feels or what he needs (eg support).
emaxxman That's a tough one... So sorry for your friend :(
I wouldn't consider it a gift, but perhaps just dropping off some meals. Also, let him know that you're there if he needs anything, no matter how trivial it might seem. My husband was a widower at 28, so he's been there. He said that what I mentioned is what helped him the most. He said the more 'gifts' people give, the more flowers they send, etc, really drives it home, if you know what I mean, and actually could make the guy feel worse. My husband knew his wife was gone, but all the 'stuff' coming to the house was terrible for him. I know death is different for everyone, this is just something to consider.
Lori...since '73 
Blackcat Most times the funeral home will be told a special charity by the family that you could donate to or if she was a member of the Catholic religion ...a Mass Card would be appropriate. Yes, a personal telephone call....brief and sincere and even if he says there is nothing at all that you can do....ask others that might know his needs better and I am sure you will find something meaningful that you can do to help ease his pain at this very difficult time. Very sad news.
joyful The gift of your time- life will seem very empty. A movie might be good as it will get him out but not require a ton of conversation ( he's probably burned out with talking).
IFirefly Thanks, everyone... yeah, it's tough. I just went to their wedding three years ago and now the funeral mass is going to be in the same church. The worst part is that she died while visiting her mother in Poland, so after hearing the news, he had to fly over there to claim the body and fly it back home. There aren't any children... not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
When my dad died, I simply appreciated it when people said, "anything I can do?"
Just knowing people cared was good enough for me.
Andy Loigu A hand-written note that shares a memory of the deceased. I think that's about as good as you can get. In a few months, an experiential gift to help the person forget his troubles for a couple hours would be nice.... something like sports tickets, a dinner out, a fishing trip, etc.
gadfly Some food he can freeze and defrost when he has an appetite. Only thing I find helpful when I am grieving. The person who said the "Stuff" just reminds you of the loss is right...
Sandy Horrible. I would say just doing stuff with him. Bringing him out of the house to eat. Bringing food is normally very kind if he has people over (who will probably bring food anyway) but I wouldn't want to sit in an empty house by myself eating alone. Better to try to separate him from the crushing lonliness and despair he is sure to experience. Ugh, I can't even begin to imagine.
Bruin So heartbraking. I agree with all of the advise. Stop by with a meal, invite him over for meals or to watch sports or a movie. Call him once or twice a week and let him do the talking if that seems to be what he needs. Include him. Even if it seems awkward fr everyone lse. When people are suddenly single, whether by death or divorce, married couples tend not to include them. Sad, but true.
And ianimal, I am sorry for your loss too. Losing a friend is a hard thing to go through.
maja 
Christine Sorry for your's and your friends loss. My family owns a garden center and I'm not saying this as a come by from me post go buy from anywhere lol but I think its the sweetest thing when someone comes in to buy a tree for someone in memory of someone who passed. Cherry Blossoms are the most popular that I have seen, but any flowering tree I think would be nice. Every spring it blooms will remind them of that loved one. You would need to wait to the spring and make sure its ok with him adding to his landscape but I always thought it was amazing. One customer said that they made a rock garden around the tree and each relative painted or wrote on cobblestones or something and it was the best thing anyone had ever done for his dad for his mother. When his dad was having a bad day he would go out and read the rocks look at them arrange them etc...
Shoebie Food. Most people will give enough that he's got dinner coveted, so maybe you could stop and drop off lunch? Along those lines...
Maybe you could do a small grocery store run? Things like milk, tissues, bread, small pkg of cold cuts, chips/snacks, etc... His wife probably did the shopping so that might be helpful to him. When you drop off the groceries, you can maybe tidy up the kitchen by simply running the dishwasher.
If he doesn't have anywhere to go for Easter, you can extend an invitation. Holidays alone are very difficult.
Antimony Covered. Sheesh auto correct!! Covet? Really?? Wacky phone writes the craziest things!
I just lost my husband this past oct , I agree no.gifts ,very painful , meals are good , my step son bought me a gift of. Mani pedi facial massage , I waited to use it in January , it was to soon , I cried during the massage , I did not feel like talking much , and still don't , didn't want to watch movies either , can't concentrate , quietly being there i for your friend and offering to help is best , but don't just offer , do it for him whatever that may be , shovel driveway , pick up groceries , feed pets if any , I did not take any offers because I don't like to ask , but my neighbor came over and did my driveway , it's hard to want to do anything , I am so sorry for your friends loss
Cowgirl1 I agree that any offer of small kindness during this difficult time is probably the best way to express your sympathy. My condolences to you and your friend. I am heartsick thinking about what he must be going through.
Aquarius So very sorry.. maybe do something in her church in her memory .
Cowgirl... you are in my prayers also... god bless!
Becca 
suzique I lost my brother last year and the best thing I received from friends and family was their support ... a kind word, a phone call, etc. My co-workers sent a tree to my home from a local nursery so that it could be planted on my property in his memory. I found that very touching and take much comfort seeing it in my backyard each day. Of course I get teary-eyed looking at it sometimes ... but it also brings about great memories of him too. My sincerest condolences to your friend on the loss of his wife.
AB company called a Spoonful of Comfort. they send excellent homemade chicken noodle soup, rolls, and other add-ons if you want them. proceeds benefit cancer research. the soup is delicious and may be a nice gift for a gentleman now on his own.
gen3Townie Probably the best thing you could do is be there for him. When my brother died (and my father and father in law) we were overwhelmed with flowers. A few people sent gift certificates to restaurants so we could order food. The most helpful were the people who actually came around though.
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